This is a learning exercise. That’s what I’m telling myself. And what I’ve learned this afternoon is that I hate jersey fabric almost as much as it clearly hates me.
I finished the dress. Or rather, I’ve put it together, I’m not bothering to hem it as it shall remain unworn for always. The world really isn’t ready for something this hideous.
Before I show you the collapsed birthday cake that is my first ever finished adult sized dress, let me show you how I fixed the issue of the enormously oversized skirt. Who knows? Perhaps some one, somewhere can salvage something from the wreckage of my afternoon.
First, I measure the bottom of the bodice, from side seam to side seam across the back. Then I matched up one of the side seams of the skirt with the corresponding side seam on the bodice and pinned it in place. I laid them out the way they would be when sewn together, and marked the spot where the new side seam needed to go, using a pin.
Measured it again to double check the numbers matched. (Measure twice, or three or four or five times. Cut once.)
Then I unpinned the bodice from the skirt, laid the skirt out as flat as possible and folded it over so that the top of the side seam matched up with where I placed my marker pin and the bottom matched up with the lower edge of the skirt.
I placed pins all the way down to make a cutting line, following the line of the existing side seam to get the shape. Then once I was sure everything was smooth etc I cut, following the line of pins.
Then I just sewed along the line of pins to make a new side seam and voila! Problem fixed. Pinned the buggery out of it, sewed it like the instructions in the book suggested and presto, finished dress.
And now, as a sort of object lesson in why certain fabrics are not for those of us with curves, I am going to post a couple of terrible terrible pictures of me in my awful creation. And then, let us never speak of it again.
So there you go. I’m humiliating myself on the internet for your benefit, you understand, so you will not make the same mistake as I have.
Now I’m going to go sew myself a new skirt to wear tomorrow instead, partly to make myself feel better about the disastrous dressmaking adventure and partly so I won’t feel like a scruffy frump. And just in case any one wonders what my offspring are doing whilst I’m busy stitching away, they’re busy trashing the house with lego.